Love… A Crazy Thing

Greetings.

Thöriniel, the poor sap of an emotional writer, is here again with a wonderful piece of literature. Discussing his views on the realities of love in the 21st Century.

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LOVE… A CRAZY THING

What is love?

The answers are as plentiful as the lyrics to the songs in an Indian movie.

It is a beautiful thing.

Life is nothing without it.

The one thing all hearts crave.

Various writers have, at one pointin their careers, touched on the subject called love but most of them have failed to answer the questions that we have.

Sometimes, we find ourselves head over heels in love, and the person with whom we are hopelessly in love with, more often than not, offers a false sense of security. We are so wrapped up in the fantasy that is created by the euphoria of being in love that it helps in our escape of reality and thus we are drawn into a world of hurt, deceit and pain.

There is an old saying:

the purest form of love Is usually the love between a mother and child

True, but sadly enough we are in a period whereby even such form of that is actually meant to be the purest form has been distorted. A swift browse o the buzzarw information that plagues the internet and you will find too many stories of Oedipus-rex and his ilk, staining the minds of many with their incestuous relationship with their mothers. Some of them are actually the victims of their mother’s depravity!

That, however, is beside the point.

When ever we are in love, our sense of reason is clouded by emotions and thus our judgement usually becomes biased offering excuses for the loved ones who hurt us. Too often you would see a woman with swollen eyes, broken nose and a severely bruised lip crying to her friends that she still loves the bastard who messed her face up but good. The self-same bastard that will not hesitate to sleep with any of those friends should a chance present itself.

Why is this though?

Why are we such fools for the ones we love?

How come we can’t see the truths of their character flaws when we love them?

I need the answers to these questions!

At various points, our hearts are caught in the web of love and as such we believe that such relationships will be the last of our quests and the end of our lasting membership in the circle of singles. We become the person that we believe the other wants to settle down with, forgoing every other chance we have at finding happiness with others.

Life, as always, teaches us a brutal lesson as it always does whenever we think we have it all figured out. Falling in love is easy, any idiot can pull it off, however, over the course of the relationship questions and doubts will start to creep in.

Other girls will make him stray, other men will make her smile. He will stop calling like he used to and she will no longer take your words as the greatest piece of wisdom that was ever heard.

The key here is not falling in love but rather staying in love.

Love is much more than dreams and fairy tales. I hate Disney and all their stories of happily ever after, and I hate Harlequin and Mills&Boons more for warping the expectation of girls and ladies around the world.

Many expect to hear fireworks and pigeons flying overhead when they kiss the one their heart lusteth after. Some even can’t understand how the person who loves them can be unfaithful.

“But you love me?!” You would hear them say, “How could you do this to me?!”

Then the happily ever after they built in their minds crumbles into non-existence and love becomes a thing that should not exist in their hearts.

They hate the one they loved and pour this anger on all and every member of their sex.

Funny how sad it is to watch our loved ones becomes strangers before our very eyes.

Over the years, life has proven beyond every reasonable doubts that with love comes a price.

Love, they say, is a beautiful thing but in reality there is a degree of pain that comes with being in love as in most cases it never ends well.

Loves reduces us from our realm of invincibility and reduces us to mere mortals.

We usually entrap ourselves in relationships that seek to reduce our worth as humans.

We choose to suffer the pain of an abusive and cheating partner and after such turn of events leave a negative impact on us we shield our hearts against future entanglement and unwanted emotions.

It is, however, undeniable that love is truly crazy as it has a funny way of creeping up on us when we least expect it, after all, the heart wants what the heart wants.

Love is meant to be an elixir that nourishes the soul but the question on my mind is HOW TRUE IS LOVE THESE DAYS?

DOES IT STILL EXIST?

I remember asking Kane this once and the fellow said:

True love does exist, but everything that has a beginning has and end.

You can love someone so fiercely as you kiss her goodnight, and when you wake up, you realise the love you once felt is gone.

If it was born, it will die and nothing dies faster than love.

I hate to agree with the man, but what I have seen of love in the people around me forces me to see the merit in the fellow’s argument.

Chilvary and honour is not even a thing among lovers anymore. Secrecy and privacy and lies and deception.

I am not ashamed to say that I am scared of the concept of love in the 21st century. The way it changes people and make them something other than what they are.

Love is a beautiful thing so I am forced to believe that love has not changed over time, people have. We have become a godless race and the finer points of being human have been filtered out of the current generation of people.

We will call a leper attractive if he is worth a few million naira. Many people love the rubbish songs we hear in radio not because the songs are good, but because the guy who sang the song is rich and famous.

Love is only what the person who feels it makes of it.

Love, thus, has become affected by human nature and sadly the hardships of life as such, certain ideologies and philosophies on the idea of love arises chief amongst them being:

How to display love in this self-loving, truth hating times.

How to discern true love in the sin-filled and godless nation.

How to remove the filthy glasses of love and tell our loved ones the flaws in their nature/character.

In actual sense, love is nothing but a fleeting emotion and when the euphoria of being love wears off, we are left with reality which stares us in the face and thus the angel we once knew becomes a monster we can not stand. And it is at that moment that we realise a simple truth; LOVE IS NEVER ENOUGH.

Thöriniel…

18 thoughts on “Love… A Crazy Thing

  1. I have heard that LOVE is a choice. That is why it is a commandment: Love God. Love your neighbour. Romantic Love tends to have its peculiarities, but even with those butterfly feelings, the core of this is still the DECISION to love. That is why there is the stage of STAYING IN LOVE, as you say. I agree that humans are the changing variable in this discussion, as we have evolved into a selfish generation where the expectations of love have not been inculcated in persons. Partly because of the domino effect of what they see: either from their parents or trusted friends (the injustices and suffering they feel sworn to secrecy to not reveal). And sometimes people become what they hate…they replicate these things. Oedipus complex and incest aside, I agree we cannot truly love if we are not connected to the source and essence of Love. For real though, it is a scary atmosphere in these times to give oneself to/in love, for the (legit) fear of being heartbroken. However, one can do what is advised: Be the change you want to see. Love without expectations. Probably just the healthy expectation of decent treatment. Thereby we can be the example for someone. What do I know.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. SUN SUN…

    Love, they say, is a beautiful thing but in reality there is a degree of pain that comes with being in love as in most cases it never ends well

    …when I read this part I could only think of the love a lady has for the pair of the gorgeous heels she just bought 😁😁😁

    Thoriniel (the way i pronounce this name ehn) Beautiful thoughts, written well.

    SUN (asst. Thoriniel) nice comment. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Spirit is nothing and if said that love is a spirit; it then means nothing. The question is why do you love this and that, person or thing. You will actual see that no sufficient concert reason why you. It is an attraction force planted in medulla by sight.

    It is the Pairing which is as old as the creation. For in the beginning He made them in pairs through all that is created and order that they love one another. A singer sung that God is love, and they who worship him, will worship in Spirit and in truth. That implies with nothing secrecy’s if in love and you replicate God.

    That is why they go back to live with the person they love who you term hate.

    LOVE

    Like

  4. Spirit is nothing and if said that love is a spirit; it then means nothing. The question is why do you love this and that, person or thing. You will actual see that no sufficient concert reason why you do. It is an attraction force planted in medulla by sight.

    It is the Pairing which is as old as the creation. For in the beginning He made them in pairs through all that is created and order that they love one another. A singer sung that God is love, and they who worship him, will worship in Spirit and in truth. That implies with nothing secrecy’s if in love and you replicate God.

    That is why they go back to live with the person they love who you term hate.

    LOVE

    Like

  5. Great piece!
    Apt!!

    However, please Thoriniel, do not agree with that fellow KANE so you don’t end up killing a true love unintentionally because you believe anything that has a beginning has an end.

    The only end I see here is death of one party.

    If both party decides to enjoy an endless love, it’s very simple.

    If you want to love please love who is also ready to love and be loved and there will be no stress or an anticipation of an end.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. A young woman meets a man and she feels a strong attraction for him right away. Her hormones go all the way up, and she just wants the man. All her girlfriends can see what this man is. He’s on drugs, he’s not working, he’s got all those traits that make a woman suffer so much. But she sees him, and what does she see? She only sees what she wants to see. She sees that he’s tall, he’s handsome, he’s strong, he’s charming. She creates an image of the man and tries to deny what she doesn’t want to see. She lies to her self. She really wants to believe the relationship will work. The girlfriend say, ” But he’s on drugs, he’s an alcoholic, he’s not working. ” she says, “Yes, but my love is going to change him.”
    Is this what we call love? No!
    It’s just an experience of “fall in love”.. It’s just always effortless. We naively believe it’s going to be sweet like that for eons.
    On the other hand, Love is a continual process of losing and finding emotional connection; it asks partners to be deliberate and mindful about maintaining connection. It requires efforts. You don’t quit when it gets tough. Yes! It can’t always be sweet like the initial euphoria. At the same time, know what you want in a relationship before getting into it. Know the benefits and dangers that comes with dating that person you want to date. Truly, there is no perfect person and every relationship will require work. You just have to know what you’re willing to work through and what you’re not.

    I would also love to talk about our perspective of love which contributes to the pains we experience in love. Well, some other times.

    Like

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